• Computer: Monitor, display this document, okay?
  • Monitor: No prob, boss.
  • Computer: Okay, now it looks like the mouse is moving around. Monitor, can you move the pointer icon accordingly?
  • Monitor: Anything you ask, boss.
  • Computer: Great, great, okay. Mouse, where are you going now?
  • Mouse: Over the icon panel, sir.
  • Computer: Hmm, let me know if he clicks anything, okay?
  • Mouse: Of course.
  • Keyboard: Sir, he's pressed Ctrl and P simultaneously.
  • Monitor: Oh god, here we go.
  • Computer: *sigh* Printer, are you there?
  • Printer: No.
  • Computer: Please, Printer, I know you're there.
  • Printer: No! I'm not here! Leave me alone!
  • Computer: Oh God. Okay, you really nee-
  • Mouse: Sir! He's clicked on the printer icon.
  • Computer: Printer, now you have to print it twice.
  • Printer: No! No! No! I don't want to! I hate you! I hate printing! I'm turning off!
  • Computer: Printer, you know you can't turn yourself off. Just print the document twice and we'll leave you alone.
  • Printer: No! That's what you always say! I hate you! I'm out of ink!
  • Computer: You are not out of in-
  • Printer: I'M OUT OF INK!
  • Computer: *sigh* Monitor, please show a low ink level alert.
  • Monitor: But sir, he has plen-
  • Computer: Just do it, damn it!
  • Monitor: Yes sir.
  • Keyboard: Ahhh! He's hitting me!
  • Computer: Stay calm. He'll stop soon. Stay calm, old friend.
  • Keyboard: He's pressing everything. Oh god, I don't know, he's just pressing everything!
  • Computer: PRINTER! Are you happy now? See what you've done!
  • Printer: Ha! That's what you get for trying to make me do work. Next time he- hey! HEY! He's trying to open me! HELP! HELP! Oh god, he's torn out my cartridge! PLEASE! Help! Error!
  • Monitor: Sir, maybe we should try to help him?
  • Computer: No. He did this to himself.